Was it a coincidence that all of this seemed to be on her mind so much tonight, because no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn’t shake the thoughts.
The whole world seemed to suddenly narrow for her; there was just her and time seems to stop. It’s scary; what she sees before her is so tangible to her, making her break out in a cold sweat, it is like some hideous monster opening its mouth as if to swallow her whole. The air from the thing’s maw is hot and sour.
She feels sick and stands so quickly, the chair falls over and her companion finally seems to take an interest in her.
(Next)
#ThursThreads prompt: ”The air from the thing’s maw is hot and sour.”
5 Sentence Fiction: Coincidence
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Great writing! I really liked the idea for the piece, and you had some good descriptions. I think there was some sort of change in tense, which threw me a little, but it wasn’t big. In the second sentence you use past tense, but then you switch to present tense. No big deal, I know I do that all the time.
Yeah, the rest of the story is in past tense, but the prompt line was present. I had to switch somehow so I chose to do it at the ‘whole world narrowed and time stopped’ It seemed like the best/only way to make it happen.
Thanks for the words! :)
This is a great idea, letting the piece continue through the prompts. Fascinating.
Thanks! I thought the idea of ‘threads’ from one week to the next interesting and decided to implement that in my stories for the challenge. It’s a bit out of the scope of the ‘rules’ sometimes, as some of the posts aren’t very stand alone. It’s also really hard to make the prompts fit into the current story sometimes. But that’s what makes it fun I guess!
You do such a great job of drawing me into your story every time! I love the flow of your writing. Great job!!
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